May 30th                                                         Sam Stack's 13th B-Day
Hey Now Everyone,

I keep apologizing for not staying on top of this blog....I realize it could translate into "what's wrong?" but not to worry, all is good. As Monday June 4th (radiation Day One) approaches, I admit to some nervousness. I also understand that it begins the countdown towards completion of treatment, and the long slow crawl out of this physical and emotional beat down.
I had a GREAT Memorial Day weekend, hope the same for you. Live music, a Giant's game, visitors.....Sam was born on the Memorial Day Sunday back in 1999.....this means that his b-day usually lasts about a week.....no party on the Memorial Day Weekend cause his buds are scattered, so we do it the following weekend, thus the one week long bacchanal. We got together with family and close friends on Sunday, and it was wonderful. My nephews have great spirit, and Sam is close with them. We hung out for about 6-7 hours, but I ran outta gas. I was able to imbibe in a couple margaritas and a beer or two, and that did not provide me any energy.....at all......but I won't be going there soon, so what the hell. The support was great, it was great to see everybody, and now it is time to roll up my sleeves and get to work.
Though I wouldn't wish this on ayone, the support and love that has come my way from everywhere has been astounding. Chicago, Atlanta, Phoenix, Denver, NYC, and all around the Bay. I am loved, I feel it, and I cherish it. Love is Real, Not Fade Away......I have gotten emails from folks I haven't spoken to in years, one in particular from SCU classmate Steve Page blew me out.....we spent a month over in Hawaii back in 1978 hanging with SCU Hawaiians (he and I were honorary locals, members of the Hawaiian Club even though we were born in SF), and his recollections and reflections from that time made me feel like I was sitting under the Halawa Falls waterfall on Molokai again.....the jungle hike in, the mystery, the serenity, the freedom, the wonder of our youth when all the world was in front of us. 34 years ago, celebrating life, loving our friends, care-free on a virtually uninhabited island.....what does it all mean? When does this ride stop for us? What stops it? Is it a little throat cancer? Is it something worse? We don't know, nothing is guaranteed, we just get up in the morning and go about our stuff. What happens when we are gone? Who picks up where we left off? Did we live our life right? Did we take care of others? Did we love unconditionally?
I'll tell you what.....my experience now, for me, has shown me that the love is there, and people will express it if they are scared and think or wonder if you may be gone. It also breeds for relative thinking, a comparative thought as to my problems vs. your problems.....we ALL go through shit, directly or indirectly, with parents, kids, friends, ourselves......my mentor and life teacher, Bill Walton reminds me that he, and I, are the luckiest guys in the world.....to love what we do, love our lives, our friends and family, to be blessed with our collective experiences both shared and expeienced individually.....and he's right. And it takes a Champion's mentality to get back to the top. Not everyone can do it, but his suggestion to read Lance Armstrong's book, "It's Not About the Bike," was a good one. I am inspired, excited, hopeful and completely FULL of wonderment as to what lies on the other side of my life when I put this cancer crap behind me. I AM lucky, because I got a reminder at 54 years old......when you get yours, make the most of it.
Don't ask me why, but in the past week, I have randomly heard an old song by Rare Earth from 1969 called "I Just Want to Celebrate Another Day of Living." Remember that one? Well, I heard it 3 times, and I have no idea why....that's not true, I do, because I believe in that stuff. So, I lean on my music and hope for the best.
Folks have had trouble posting a response to the blog....go to "Comments" and click on it. That should bring you to a box that you can begin typing in and then hit post (I think) and I'll get it. I get ALL of them. Traffic has slowed a bit with the initial diagnosis fading, but I still need you. Post something and I will revel in your support. Take care and be safe, I'll be back soon.
Aiko, Aiko
TS